SPEARHEAD: IN RHYMED PROSE, TO THE DRINKER AND MONARCH OF COLOMBIAN LA CIENEGA DEL ORO. TO THE ZIPAZGO OF THE MUISCAS, WHERE THE CORN FERMENT MADE ALCOHOL COMES FROM. AND… TO THE LIFE OF THE TASTY THAT MAKES HISTORY.

Generoso y amable eres con la copa. Comelón goloso, de sancocho y arepa. Seria saludable, su señoría, que el pueblo lo sepa, que los defectos suyos como soberano santurrón, se hacen ostensibles, como gran ilustre pendejón, para… como quien, no quiere la cosa, pero inspirado en la destreza, se olvida de los pobres y de su pobreza.

Generous and kind you are with the cup. Gourmet eater, sancocho and arepa. It would be healthy, your honor, for the people to know, that your defects as a sanctimonious sovereign, become ostensible, like a great illustrious asshole, for… like someone who doesn’t want the thing, but inspired by skill, forgets about the poor and his poverty.

Pregona usted señoría, que hay que vivir en sabrosura y…del pueblo, nada, le interesa. Pero… hablando de libar copas, con alegres risotadas, que entre comprimidos camaradas, forman el misterioso sanedrín, sepa, que no me refiero a la copa del burro infatigable, que, al desenvainar su sable, que no es de vidrio, sino de carne, os pone como viejos verdes, con las alas caídas, a sufrir. No. El tema suyo, que os defiende con orgullo, es como sacar de cada acto, una tajada, de la gran torta de fresa, que, en este caso, pienso yo, es a usted, monarca, lo único que le interesa.

You preach, your honor, that you have to live in deliciousness and…from the town, nothing interests you. But… speaking of sipping glasses, with joyful laughter, that between compressed comrades, form the mysterious Sanhedrin, know that I am not referring to the glass of the indefatigable donkey, who, when unsheathing his saber, which is not made of glass, but of meat , makes you like dirty old men, with drooping wings, to suffer. No. His theme, which he proudly defends you, is like getting a slice out of each act, from the great strawberry cake, which, in this case, I think, is you, monarch, the only thing that interests you.

Cuando veis la botella de licor a solas, se te cruzan de alegría las emociones, y… del cerebro, hacen corto circuito, tus pasiones, localizadas en desordenes mentales, que se “chispotean” en utópicas ilusiones. Sirenas de ensueño, en odisea, estremecen tu corazón de alegrías, que al escuchar dulces voces, cantando, porro, y vallenato, te recuerdan tus puercas porquerías, en las que en tus ratos de plena holgura, desfloraste la inocencia en primavera: como fuera, haciendo gala del fusil, el poder y las diabluras. Se convirtieron tus ojos deseosos e insaciables.

When you see the bottle of liquor alone, your emotions cross with joy, and… your brain short-circuits your passions, located in mental disorders, which «sparkle» in utopian illusions. Dream sirens, in an odyssey, shake your heart with happiness, that when you hear sweet voices, singing, joint, and vallenato, remind you of your dirty filth, in which in your moments of full ease, you deflowered innocence in spring: as it were , showing off the rifle, power and mischief. Your eager and insatiable eyes became

Se torna el timbre de tu voz en dramática, ronca y oscura. Tus parpados gruesos se caen, para sufrir de una lamentable, mal vistosa e imprevista dermatocalasia, que te hacen perder la gracia, para volverte en un beodo, ostentoso, que honra la locura.

The timbre of your voice becomes dramatic, hoarse and dark. Your thick eyelids droop, to suffer from an unfortunate, unattractive and unexpected dermatochalasis, which makes you lose grace, to become drunken, ostentatious, who honors madness.

La lengua se te traba. Y el pensamiento, lo tenéis sustraído.
Por tu mente sale humo, y de tu boca, verbos hechos malabares. Fama que vuela de bar, en bares. Bohemios te miran con miedo y con lastima, al ver al ídolo confundido, que, entre eufemismos y mentiras, suavizas con destreza, tus perfidias y ansiedades, que delatan tus horrorosas debilidades.

Your tongue gets stuck. And the thought, you have stolen it. Smoke comes out of your mind, and juggling verbs out of your mouth. Fame that flies from bar, to bars. Bohemians look at you with fear and pity, seeing the confused idol, which, between euphemisms and lies, skillfully softens your perfidy and anxieties, which reveal your horrible weaknesses.

Tus incoherencias, sinrazones y embarradas, se muestran con tus enormes cagadas, y monumentales disparates. Engañosos son, para el pueblo, y sus raizales.

Your inconsistencies, unreasonable and muddy, are shown with your huge shit, and monumental nonsense. They are misleading, for the people, and their roots.

Presidente, monarca, servidor público, que bebedor sea. Después de pasado de copas, hasta en la estatua de la justicia, se mea, sin importarle un reverendo carajo. Y… si es como aquel senador del bajo, que putas al capitolio, o a la fiesta lleva, no vale ni un ápice y menos de un burro, tiene un carajo.

President, monarch, public servant, what a drinker he is. After having a few drinks, even on the statue of justice, he pisses, not giving a damn about it. And… if he’s like that senator downstairs, who whores the capitol, or brings to the party, he’s not worth an iota and less than a donkey, he’s a damn.

EL que en demasía beba alcohol, por más fino y puro que sea el licor, después de cuatro copas mal bebidas, se pierde el principio y el pudor, que termina rascándose la cabeza,
en pleno banquete/ con el usado tenedor, sea en Venus, ONU, u OEA.

HE who drinks too much alcohol, no matter how fine and pure the liquor, after four badly drunk glasses, loses the principle and modesty, who ends up scratching his head, in full banquet / with the used fork, be it in Venus, ONU, or OEA.